I’ve never understood this costume. Are there people out there who think that cats are sexy, so they thought that a woman dressed as a cat would be sexy? I shudder at the thought of some drunken costume designer 15 years ago sitting alone in his studio a month before Halloween, failed costume ideas strewn about the room at his feet.

Another year of princess and pirate costumes, he thinks to himself. If only I could come up with a game changer, something they’ll remember me by. Something provocative. Something sexy. His eyes slowly scan the room. A sofa, empty beer cans, a half-eaten pizza, some softcore pornography. Nothing sexy there. Just then he feels something brush up against his leg. It’s Muffin, his favorite cat and long time companion. Muffin looks up coyly then slinks across the room towards the window. She jumps up on to the windowsill and looks back over her shoulder as if to say, I know you were watching. It’s then that he realizes that he’s been holding his breath the entire time. Oh my god, he thinks to himself. That was the single most erotic thing I’ve ever seen. This is the costume I’ve been waiting for, the one they’ll remember me by. The sexy cat. I’ll be a millionaire!