Watch this entire video before reading below.

People think that loving cats is harmless, even rewarding. This video is absolute scientific proof that cats are a poisonous force that will drive you absolutely insane if exposed for too long. Look at this woman. She’s batshit crazy.

She’s buy 20 tins of cat food and a bottle of E&J whiskey at the supermarket crazy. She’s take her cat for a picnic at the park crazy. She’s the type of crazy that not only regularly gives her cat a massage, but then takes it upon herself to make a video teaching OTHER people to give cat massages. How is that even a thing? I can’t even begin to imagine the horrifying reality that this woman lives in every day.

“Here Champion, it’s time for mommy to give you a cat massage. Whisker watch alert is in effect!”